Escape...

In the interests of taste and decency let me summarise the situation as:
- I was a bit bunged up and uncomfortable
- remedies were provided
- problem solved.

I'm being kicked out of hospital today, and bureaucracy permitting I'll be leaving within a few hours (I'm going to organise my own taxi as they always take ages).

I've been told that over the next few weeks I need to take care to drink lots of water, only eat small meals at regular intervals, keep a reasonable amount of dietary fibre (but not too much), and no gassy foods/fizzy drinks. This is all precautionary to get my innards back to normal, but distinctly preferable to surgery!